Success?

When I got home from school today, I got online and the first thing that I saw was a headline that said Heath Ledger had been found dead at the age of 28. My mouth dropped open, even though I wouldn’t have called myself a great fan of his work; I have only seen him in a handful of films. I think this surprised me so much because of his age and his seeming success. It surprised me more to learn that his death could have been the result of a suicide.As I was reading about all of this, it made me wonder why people, including myself, often place celebrities on top of their list of people imitate. It is so easy to see the luxuries and the fame and not truly focus on what’s underneath all of it.

When I think of a successful life, I often think very materialistically. If I were to make a list of things that show success, I would probably include a nice house, expensive cars, popularity, a large bank account, and other similarly outward things. These things come to mind first, I think, because the American culture is so wrapped up in them. I was watching a talk show a while back, and the guests were a group of young teenage girls. When asked who they wanted to be like, a couple said Paris Hilton. I wondered what in the world would make them want to be like her instead of anyone else. I’m taking what I assume to be a pretty accurate guess in thinking that these girls were not admiring Hilton’s character, but were seeing her success as defined by Hollywood terms and believing that materialistic success was more important than philanthropy or integrity.

I think every single person fantasizes about “the good life.” Everyone wonders how different life would be with a million dollars, or a nicer house, or more luxury items. And there’s nothing wrong with a life of luxury, but all too often I see that and automatically equate it, or perhaps even place it higher, than a life of sacrifice or just mere normalcy.

Though I don’t understand why, I like reading about various celebrities. A few months back, after Owen Wilson’s alleged suicide attempt, I was reading an article about him on TV Guide’s website. Some of the comments posted by people surprised me. One person wondered why Wilson would ever opt for suicide when he has a successful film career, money, extravagance, etc. They thought he should be satisfied with all of that, saying if they had what he had they wouldn’t have the same problems.

It seems as if no one is ever truly content with their lives, at least not for long. And, in a way, that’s a good thing; being complacent is no way to live. But to always be lunging after these unrealistic goals is sort of ridiculous.

I subscribe to several magazines, and by the time I finish flipping through them I have probably thought, “If only I had that outfit, that bag, that hair, those legs…” I forget that all I have is who I am in this exact moment: a 5′2” self who is a self-proclaimed nerd and bookworm. I am very pleased with my life, and realize I am incredibly blessed. But that doesn’t keep me from thinking that life would be even better if I was more successful in the outer and materialistic ways so beloved by modern society.

If Ledger’s death was indeed the result of suicide, I hope that no one judges him too harshly for that, believing that he had everything he could ever have wanted. I hope that no one rolls their eyes and thinks that if they had what he did, they would be grateful instead of depressed. When it comes down to it, we can never know if money or power or outer beauty could ever really make us happier. Perhaps those things could for a time, but happiness is not directly related to “success.”

When I think about what success really looks like, I want to think of Mother Teresa before Paris Hilton. I want to think of someone like Martin Luther King, Jr. before I think of Tom Cruise. Instead of striving for life’s luxuries, my time would be better suited striving to be a better human being, one that understands that success is most often determined only in legacy.

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